When Less is More

When you have a chronic condition, you never feel like you do enough. In lfe, or for yourself to improve your health. It's like a cloud of always fallng short and so when and where we can, we push ourselves.

Sometimes that looks like extreme dieting. Sometimes it looks like fetal position and tears when the rest of the family is asleep. Sometimes it's pushing ourselves to the very edge of our physical abilities because "someone" (sometimes our own mind) tells us we can't quit, can't slack, can't rest until we collapse.

When it comes to self-care, this reaching for the elusive, magical "enough" is often even more extreme than all the rest. Why? Because we're hurting, we're desperate, we're grasping, we're hopeful, we're determined, we're disciplined...maybe if we push harder something will shift. Often though, the opposite happens and the cloud of failure gets bigger and stormier and we don't know why, because we're doing ALL the things the very best we can.

People are confused when they work with me, especially when they've been striving in that more is more mentality for years. My approach is different. It's gentle. It's slow. It's calm. It is, in many ways, less than what they've done before. And they wonder why.

My personal journey, and the insights and partnering with other women like me, has given me a unique data set. With each experience, with each client, I make notes, I look for patterns, I listen to what's changing. One of the most impactful things that happens when we slow down and use a systematic approach is that women feel foundational shifts. It may be that crippling anxiety is manageable again. Sometimes it's a 20-year-old pain that goes away. There have been old surgery scars that diminish and release their hold. Walking is no longer painful. Kneeling on the floor becomes possible again. And some of these real-life examples happened within the first two weeks. All while doing less.

When we allow our bodies to settle and use gentle persuastion rather than constant force our immune system and nervous system begin to respond better, which allows our physical body to begin responding in a new way. When we learn to breathe from the diaphragm it signals healing and rest instead of tension and trauma. When we work on the feet and make subtle shifts in alignment, our bodies respond with positive change. When we reduce the load on the body and shift to a mode of restoration the whole story changes, and often our bodies find a place that feels safe.

If you've pushed and pushed and your body feels stuck, maybe it's time to extend some grace to the body that's working so hard to keep up.

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